Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
