what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Boobs speak an international language.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
