just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
we're making bets on your personal life
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
