p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
