I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
