Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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