He had one of those small greek statue penises
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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