don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Im part way to drunk.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
