oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I love you. Go after that dick
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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