at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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