I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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