a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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