You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
