He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
