Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
