Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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