and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
