Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
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Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
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i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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