why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
