Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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