this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize