just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
