I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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