I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
