question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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