you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize