butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize