Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
