Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize