I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Randomize
