I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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