i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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