Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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