let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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