direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize