quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Randomize
