jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
