Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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