i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Still dying that you shit outside
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
