can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Man, jail baloney is awful.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize