some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize