my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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