erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
