i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
