I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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