the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
