You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
love makes seman taste better
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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