Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
