Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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