Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
